Parent Partnership: Easier Said Than Done
Why hearing the parent voice matters for your mission.
“To answer before listening— that is folly and shame.” — Proverbs 18:13
“Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry…” — James 1:19
Parent partnership is one of the most common phrases in Christian education. Many mission statements include it in some form: “assisting the parent,” “with the support of the home,” or “partnering with families to raise students to know and follow Christ.”
But as every school leader knows, living that partnership is easier said than done. It requires humility, patience, and a willingness to engage with parents even when conversations are difficult.
This is the first article in a three-part series on strengthening communication between home and school:
Part 1 – When Parents Speak, We Listen
Part 2 – Finding the Gold in What Parents Share
Part 3 – Building Partnership by How We Answer
And it all begins here: listening well. Without it, the rest of the process falls apart.
Note: This series focuses on school-wide, leadership responses to parent feedback. However, elements of this process can be applied to how we respond as teachers, coaches, staff, etc.
Parents Are Not the Enemy
When a parent emails with a concern or stops by your office unannounced, it can be easy to feel interrupted—or even defensive. But parents are not adversaries. They are our primary partners in the discipleship of their children.
If our mission truly includes assisting and supporting parents, then we must approach them as allies. They are co-laborers in the work God has called us to, not obstacles to manage. Christian education is fundamentally designed for the home and school to work together for the benefit of the child.
Certainly, some parents may be more active in their children's education than others, and that is to be expected. Some parents may also be categorized as "bulldozer" or "helicopter" in nature, or perhaps be absent from their child's educational journey. The challenge is not to lump parents into one category but to see them as individual storytellers for your school.
Parents Know More Than You Think
Teachers and administrators see students in one context—school. Parents see them in dozens of others. They know their children’s fears, habits, strengths, and weaknesses in ways we never will.
Listening to parents with humility allows us to see the fuller picture. Even if we don’t agree with every perception, their insight can help us better understand and serve the student or improve the school experience. A parent’s feedback is not unlike a customer’s review—it might focus on small details, like the tone of a group message or the timing of a car line, or it might raise a big-picture idea that could strengthen the school’s culture and effectiveness. Both types of feedback matter because they reveal how parents experience the school and give leaders opportunities to improve.
Create Opportunities to Hear the Parent Voice
Good listening doesn’t just happen when a parent raises a concern. Schools that value parent partnership create consistent channels for feedback:
Surveys that invite open-ended responses, not just ratings
State of the School events where parents can hear updates and ask questions in a safe setting
Regular communication touchpoints like parent coffees, forums, or classroom updates
A general understanding of where to go with an immediate concern
When we invite feedback before problems arise, we show parents we care about what they think and that their voice matters.
Final Word
Listening to parents is not a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of strength. It shows humility, builds trust, and honors the God-given role of parents in a child’s discipleship.
Listening well does not mean agreeing with every request or doing exactly as a parent wishes. Some parents will only be able to see situations through the lens of their own child and may make demands accordingly. Trying to accommodate every request, exactly when and how it’s made, is exhausting and unsustainable. More importantly, it can erode the consistency and integrity of your leadership.
As we move through this series, we’ll explore how to interpret what parents share (Part 2) and how to respond in ways that strengthen partnership (Part 3). But first, it all begins here: When parents speak, we listen.